Several years ago a good friend and professional colleague asked me, when did I first notice civility and courtesy disappearing from our society? I hesitated a moment, then responded with a rather jolting acknowledgment . . . “about 15 years ago.” Rather a sad commentary then, and unfortunately more so today. It gives me great pause how incivility, discourtesy, lack of respect, decorum, propriety, protocol, etiquette, dignity, gentility, and seamliness is readily accepted as just the way things are . . . meaning that it is acceptable in a myriad of situations for a myriad of reasons. At times, it is almost an experience of culture shock, while in other instances it is almost likened to feeling alien, in an environment of unrecognizable behavior on a multitude of levels. We always have within us the ability to choose with mindful intention, exactly how we respond in any given circumstance. “Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them,” as stated by Leo Tolstoy. The modicum in concious awareness of despicable, contemptible and sordid behavior, is the initial step in our choosing mindful intention stated by Marcus Aurelius . . . ”The happiness of our life, depends on the quality of our thoughts.” We can rise above any and all criticism given the tools of intention . . . if we so choose. It always distills to what we embody as who we are, and incorporating present conscious intention, by observing our own behavior first. The expectation of change begins within ourselves, before it can exist elsewhere. How we arrived where we now find ourselves in this present society, is an exercise in futility. It is the better choice to move forward with the tools of intention, that will create an environment of civility and knowing as so aptly stated in the words of Corrie ten Broom . . . “Our critics are the upaid guardians of our souls.” Change begins with the individual accepting responsibility for their actions, followed by the appropriate choice in behavior, with respect and dignity. JLR
